I don't like the tooth fairy. That's right, I said it. Don't get me wrong, it hasn't always been like this, the tooth fairy and I used to be on good terms. I would lose a tooth, she would leave me money. How could I possibly not like that arrangement? Well, easy - she took a part of my little girl away this week.
The day started innocent enough with our typical schedule - gymnastics, errands, and then a meet up of friends at Chick-fil-a. Just another Friday, until suddenly little A exclaims, "my tooth hurts." I thought she might just have something caught in her tooth, until my friend asked if she had a loose tooth. I immediately hushed that silly idea, little A is too little to lose a tooth. Then, I saw it. The tooth was bloody and barely hanging on. How could this be happening? Ashley started screaming in fear. I tried to pull the tooth but was way too nervous. In an odd turn of events, my single, male neighbor happened to be eating lunch. So, my friend, Danesha called him over to pull her tooth. He actually came, ready and willing to help! Poor guy, he might be a little scarred from having children for awhile. Ashley would have none of that. Fortunately, J had just finished a test and was at home. I called and he came to our rescue. What a miracle worker! The tooth came out pristine and all was well within a few minutes. Little A was super excited about having the tooth fairy visit her last night. She drew her a picture and wrote her note asking where her tooth was going to go. It was all very sweet.
So, why does that hurt me so much? This tooth just happened to fall out the day after I had to go to a sneak peak of her kindergarten next year. I have been really excited about this, until I was actually there. Seeing all the little lockers and tables really got to me. The teachers were all super cute and nice but hearing their day's schedule made my head spin. Then there were all the forms: PTA, Handbooks, Manuscript practice, Requirements, Guidelines, How to prepare for next year.... the list could go on and on. I realized I wasn't ready for this even though Ashley is. Then, the tooth. It was like the straw that broke the camel's back. How did I get here? When did it all happen?
Don't get me wrong, I love many things about her getting older. To celebrate her big day, I took her to get her nails done with me. It melted my heart to sit next to her while we did something girlie and special for us. At the same time my heart hurt to know I would never be able to go back and hold her as a baby. Why does life have to be like that? We want our kids to grow up and be independent but at the same time yearn for them to be little forever. I am sure it seems silly to agonize over one little lost tooth but I know that this one little tooth is about to lead to another. Then, the next thing I know there will be no little teeth to pull and she will no longer be my little girl. I look forward to seeing the young lady, then the woman she will become, but I also will always be longing for that special time I will never be able to get back.